23 August 2011

Broken On The Brooklyn Bridge

Sometimes, even when the sun comes up in the morning and the sky is full of summer-blue, sad news comes floating on the wind. A couple mornings ago, Roman told me he was thinking of leaving The Troop and asked if he could talk to me about it. I said yes and told him I'd meet him on the steps leading up to the Brooklyn Bridge.

We flew to the top of the arches and sat for awhile. I could tell he was a little nervous to talk, so I waited. I thought about the hard work it would be to build an incredible bridge and then I thought about the hard time Roman must be having. There's no two-ways about it: bridge building is difficult but deconstructing a bridge may be more difficult.

We flew to a bench and Roman asked, "Did you know the first creator of this bridge died as a result of working on this bridge? Did you know the creator's son was paralyzed from working on it?" I shook my head no and stayed quiet a little longer. Roman was having a hard time with his life-bridge.

Bridges are structures that get you from one place to another; bridges help people stay above water; bridges are constantly being used by folks going in opposite directions.

Even though bridges makes it easy to cross from one side to the other side, you occasionally run into sharp-pointed obstacles.

Suspension cables need to be anchored to either side of a bridge to create tension. The tension helps to keep it up. The suspension cables are made up of hundreds of smaller cables. But what if your suspension cables are losing their anchor? What if it feels like your bridge is broken or breaking?

Roman told me that even though he knew there was plenty of blue-sky above, he was feeling trapped on his life's-bridge. I cried. Have you ever felt that way before? I have.

We sat above the East River and took some time to look at the 8 bridges that spanned it—8 different bridges made to cross the same body of water.

When some time passed, I asked Roman a question, "What can we do to help you?" "I'm not sure," he said, "But I think I need to leave for awhile. I need some time and space to figure out how to rebuild my bridge."

What do you do when you don't know what to do? What do you do when your friend is weary, feeling small, when tears are in his eyes?

You find his "can't be found" friends when darkness comes and pain is all around him. You take his part.

You remind him the time has come to shine and his dreams are on their way.

You tell him: If you need friends, we're sailing right behind like a bridge over troubled waters. And maybe one day, the wind will bring him back.


  1. I am sitting at work crying.

    Roman, we will miss you. Red Fred and the rest of the Troup, remember to be Jolly, even when it is hard. Saying good bye is ALWAYS hard...


  2. Very touching. Wonderful post. Thank you and sending all love and prayers to Roman and the Jolly Troop at this time. It always works out in the end, that we can always have hope in :)

  3. You are the most beautiful human being. I send love to you & Roman. Divine winds hold you both. Bridges are temporary. The love you've shared is yours forever.

  4. my.love.to.Roman.and.Red.Fred.Always.

  5. Sometimes our friends take the bridge route away from us, sometimes they come back across the same way. And sometimes the bridge brings something entirely unexpected and wonderful!

  6. You are just awesome! Simple as that!!!